Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
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i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
it's like heaven, but drunker
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
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does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
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