so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
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