let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize