the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
