she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
