hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Randomize
