so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
