Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
do nipples grow back?
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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