how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
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