So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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