She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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