I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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