I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize