I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Randomize
