Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
