spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Randomize
