No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
Randomize
