He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
