I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
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