ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
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