Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize
