their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Randomize
