Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Randomize
