Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
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