? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize