your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
That's intense
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
