I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Randomize
