My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
