His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
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