I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
