She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
The beer is more important than you right now.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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