this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
