I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize