What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
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