I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
