Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
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