Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
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