Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
nutella sex= disaster
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize
