I got chris browned last night
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Randomize
