i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
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I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
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