he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
