I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
Randomize
