he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
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