I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
You left your underwear on the fireplace
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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