Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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