These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
