I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Randomize
