I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
