apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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