i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Randomize
